First Romance: What Parents Should Do
Let us face it; there will come a time that your child will fall in love. Call it puppy love, crush or whatever you want, but you must accept it and give proper guidance. Allowing your child to be involved in a boy-girl relationship will depend on your child’s ability to take the responsibility of loving someone. But before doing so, allow me to remind you of some important things.
You must know your child
This is the most important factor among them. Having no idea what your child is up to is a big shame on you. Surely, it is not enough that you see your child everyday and work hard to give all the material things your child needs especially during the adolescent years. If you raise your children properly and have a good bonding with them, then there will be no qualms in sharing with you such secrets.
You must know the person
It is very important that you know your child is in love with. To begin with, require your child to tell you who he is courting, or who is courting her. Definitely, that boy should visit your house and meet with you decently instead of stalking around. You should also know the person’s family background and history. However, do not judge at once if you feel like that the person did not meet your requirements. Just give your child some serious advices.
You must be always be updated
As a parent, you should always know what is happening to your child. Require them to do so but do not be too demanding. He or she will not give all the details, and that is for sure. You can also ask your child’s close friends but again, do not sound like an FBI. Remember that they are the friends of your child, not yours. It is better if you watch the actions of your child closely. Young heartaches are not usually being shared immediately.
Trust your child
In the first place, you should not allow your child to enter into such relationship if there is no complete trust. When you feel you still cannot trust your child, talk about it and give some tests for your child. It is very important that your child understand why you still do not allow him or her. Do not be too naive when your daughter asks permission to go alone with someone. It is better the boy will personally ask permission to you, that means he has a good intention.
Share your experience
Children will be excited to hear them, especially the love story of his parents. You can also share your previous heartaches, if there was. Children will learn a lot from them. Teach your child how to prepare for the first date, topics to be discussed, cool places to go, and give some safety advices. Safety here does not mean you advice your child about safe sex. Teenage sex is definitely out of the topic, it is a must not-to-do thing no matter how broad minded you are.
First love never dies. It only gets older.
Related post:
How to Protect your Daughter from Sex Offenders
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Hmmm…I want to be a cool mom, if ever I want to befriend the guy and show that I also trust him so he won’t do anything bad to my daughter..pero I don’t think I am ready to know that my daughter is having a relationship at a very young age lol!.. kaso, that’s life and she should enjoy life. Maybe telling her the responsibility at least for herself will help her to think before she does a thing that we parents don’t expect them to do at a very young age.
Actually, I made this post after my daughter is shared to me about her latest crush. Then she asked me seriously , when will I allow me to have a boyfriend?
I tried to be calm as I am holding on to the edge of my seat to prevent me from falling. Then I answered back also seriously – No way, you’re going to be a nun! Then we burst into laughter!
My point is, convince our children to be vocal about about serious and critical matters. Then gradually, explain to them the pros and cons. Now my daughter says she is willing to wait to be mature enough.
Thanks for your time here once again, my friend!
You look gorgeous today! lol!
My wife encourages classmates (Close friends) of our children to make their school projects in our home for us to get to know them better. She even knew their classmates cell number. When our eldest daugther did have a suitor during her college days, they have to come and visit her at home.
All of our children knew our rule about that matter.It is nice to know that whenever some relatives would ask them if they have already a Bf – Gf,their reply is “Ayaw po ni mama”.hehehe.
I was kinda intrigued with your last words – Ayaw po ni Mama. Do we share the same problem at home? lol!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, partner!
kaya dapat simulan na agad na maging open ang communication with our kids kahit na babies pa lang sila… kasi kapag comportable na pagusapan lahat ng bagay, pati na rin dating and relatioships, hopefully, e hindi magiging mabigat na usapan
welcome sa WPP
This is the most difficult part of parenting. Though I am not a parent yet, I have a lot of experience dealing with my nieces and nephews…
Very well said, Kenkay! It is our duty as parents to mold our child as responsible lovers of tomorrow.
Salamat po sa pag-welcome mo sa akin sa WPP. Mabuhay ang Wordpress Filipino Bloggers!
Raden – this is very true! That is why I am preparing myself since my daughter is now 12 years old.
You can use your experience as an uncle when your time comes.
I am glad to see you there, My Mentor!