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Time flies so fast, and I am really surprised that my only daughter is now 13. I am 30 years older than her so I thought that we will have a generation gap. But I am just glad we do not encounter such problems.

Angelene is now taller than her mom, while her interests are gradually becoming different. Therefore, it is also time for me to change the way I treat her. I must admit, I am still learning but I already learned a lot.

With this, here are some ways that I think on how a father should love his teenage daughter.

Be extremely patient

Gone are the days that I can just use my eyes to tell my teenage daughter that she should follow me. This time, I should be extremely patient to avoid her to be rebellious. Teenagers are very sensitive since they are still confused with the thin wall between being a child and an adult. Right now, they need to be understood and parents can only do that if they will be extremely patient. Teenagers hate to be reminded, so parents should think of ways on how to remind them without treating them like a child.


Set house rules and make an agreement

Every morning, I remind her to fix her bed before leaving her room. When she arrives from school, her mom reminds her to put her shoes on the shoe rack. Instead of reminding her all the time, we made an agreement. Once she fails, she will wash her bed sheets and we will not anymore buy her a new pair of shoes. So far, she still misses these things but lesser than before. Each day, she is being more responsible and I know she can improve more. House rules and agreements should be clear and reasonable to the parties concerned.

Give her freedom but with sense of responsibility

My teenage daughter is sometimes hesitant to ask permission from me if she wants to go out with her friends. This is because she thinks that I will not allow her, which is why she tell it first to her mom. After I know the details as to where she will go and with whom, then I decide whether she can go or not. As a father, I believe that giving freedom to his children includes realizing that they have the sense of responsibility of enjoying that freedom. Otherwise, that freedom will be their disaster later on.

Have constant good communication

Some fathers might say that since they are working abroad, it is hard for them to have constant good communication with their family as well as to their teenage daughter. However, there are some fathers who come home everyday but still fail on this aspect. Therefore, having constant good communication requires planning and be taken into priority. As for me, this is the most important part of being a good father and being a good provider is only the second one. If Angelene commits mistake, we talk about it and enjoy another day.

Put continuous trust

These days, there are a lot of temptations around my teenage daughter and I cannot always watch her. There are also times that she should take care of her younger brother and therefore, I have to trust her enough. I truly believe that it is the trust from parents that teenagers can be used to make them mature and confident. If they commit mistakes, it does not mean that you stop trusting them. They may still be young, but they are old enough to learn from their mistakes. However, parents should check first which tasks their children can be trusted well enough.

Teach her about boys

For now, Angelene likes food better than boys and I wish it will take her long before it will be the other way around. But this early, I teach my teenage daughter about boys. I always remind her that a love relationship is not as simple as what she sees in films and TV shows. As her father, I also tell her how to know if a guy is for real or not and how to protect herself from sex offenders. Lastly, I keep on telling them the bad effect of teenage pregnancy. And that having a child is a responsibility that only mature people should go into it.

As a father, we should take this chance while our children are still young. Teenagers should enjoy their youth, but we should be there to guide them while they are building their dreams. Sooner or later, they will have lives of their own and we cannot turn back the clock to catch up with the lost time.


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How to Teach your Teenage Boys to respect Women
What Children Do Not Want From Their Parents
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How to Protect your Daughter from Sex Offenders
How Parents can avoid Sibling Jealousy

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